foomart foomart

 Tuesday, March 13

Well, okay, so it's been a day. I got up at 6, with a jolt, as I realized I hadn't gotten a confirmation call about the refrigerator repair that was scheduled for today. Same refrigerator that broke a week ago, yes. Anyway, I hadn't gotten a call or an email, but Echo was down yesterday so any emails would have bounced. As it turns out, they did call, hung up without leaving a message, and Googling the mysterious phone number reveals I did get a confirmation call of sorts. But I didn't know that at 6 this morning.

I tried to get back to sleep since the repair window was from 8 to 12 and I'd selected "as early as possible" in the additional options. So my clock was set for 7 and I really needed the extra sleep since I'd been up late the night before since my body didn't get the memo about the bullshit time change.

Anyhoo, there was no sleeping after the jolt so at 6:38 or so I got up and took a shower and got dressed and made coffee and started a batch of yogurt to use up the rest of the dairy products that had been out on the balcony in a cooler bag with some ice. I knew that today it was supposed to get up into the 50s, which would normally make me very happy, but since the outdoors is our refrigerator these days, this was not the usual good news. However, I figured it wouldn't hit the high temps until at least noon and the fridge would be working by then, of course, since the window was from 8 to 12 and I'd selected "as early as possible" which of course meant he'd be there right at 8. Which was why I got out of bed at 6:38.

I sent IMs to B, documenting my waiting, every half hour or so starting at 8:00. I called my boss at some point with a status report that I was still at home. She knew I was going to be late, but since my service window was from 8 to 12 and I'd selected "as early as possible" in the options I knew I wouldn't be too late. So at 11 I called the service people, navigated the phone menus, and they said that the fact that I'd called to check up would be noted in my service record. Good, I thought, maybe that way the repaircritter will realize I have places to go and will get here early. I mean even earlier than he was already planning, what with my having checked the "as early as possible" box and all.

Around 11:15 I got an automated message that I was next on the list for service. When the repaircritter came last week, he came about 20 minutes after that message. (Yeah. Last week. Same job. Apparently, looking at the circuit board, unplugging the fridge and plugging it back in doesn't actually fix the thing for all that long.) So yay. I called my job and left a voice mail in case any of the guys came in early and wondered why the door was locked and where the hell I was.

20 minutes came and went. 30. 40. Set. Match. I started sharpening knives. An hour later, the fucking bozo rang the bell, not a word about being late. No apology, no acknowledgement that I'd checked the "as early as possible" box. He just wanted to chat about my pinball machines. I growled at him and flipped the breaker for the fridge upstairs.

He had clearly never seen one of these newfangled fridges before. Pulled it out from the wall, saw the cover plate where the computer stuff is, ignored that completely, and started dismantling it from the inside, after forcing me to take part in a spectacularly stupid conversation. ("It seems cold inside," he said. "That is because I have placed a large block of ICE in there", I said.) Anyway, he took the thing apart and found a screw that was loose on the bracket to the fan. Here it is, he said, here's your problem, the reason your freezer is 60 degrees. This screw was loose on the fan bracket. That will be one hundred and seventy-two dollars.

At this point it was after 1PM and my refrigerator was in pieces all over my kitchen, so, having few choices, I paid him the money and he screwed it back together and all appeared to be well. I went off to work, narrowly avoiding murdering the kid who wondered if I had a few minutes for the environment, and had a short work day. I worked out, serious power punching with my Navy friend who just got back from Saudi Arabia, and after I changed I checked my phone and there was a happy voice mail from B saying the fridge was 35 degrees and the freezer was 6.

So I went home, tired but happy, and walked into the condo meeting already in progress. There was wine and munchies, and it was remarkably non-contentious as we decided how we'd spend the money we have and how we'll spend the money we'll get. We also had elections and I'm the new president. Hail to the mothafuckin' chief. Stand back, Buenos Aires, I intend to rule with an iron fist.

Aaaand then B noticed that the freezer was 31 degrees. So even my new presidential powers weren't enough to fix the fact that I had to schedule yet another service appointment because, as I suspected, the fucktard had no idea what he was doing. A three-second Google reveals that BAD LOGIC BOARDS are endemic to this model and obviously this one needs replacing. I guess these servicecritters don't have Google. So I wait. And I wait. And I wait. And I sharpen the knives.

* * *

I just checked. Freezer's up to 43. Must kill.
12:59 AM

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