Monday, December 20
They say there's no such thing as the weather being too cold, that the problem is simply one's being underdressed. Well, my acquisitions to that end got their first test tonight, and passed famously. I got a pair of unflattering hunting pants from eBay; they're full of Thinsulate™ and add ten pounds like a camera. They're wonderful. I walked down to the gym tonight with weather in the teens and my legs never felt a hint of cold. In fact, I was a bit sweaty once I got there, which made them a bit of a challenge to take off. They're a skosh tight now that I've put on a couple of pounds, and require a tad of the Jordache hoochie coochie to get on and off. Not quite the Gloria Vanderbilt lie-on-the-bed-and-use-Vise-Grips, but a little bit of wigglin' and jigglin' and grabbin' on my pelvis (but you know my name, so you'll never hear no Elvis). In any case, sweat didn't much help that situation, but I got them on and off eventually.
My feet were covered by my discount boots. They're camouflage, of course, and made of waterproof breathable Gore-Tex™ and toasty 800-gram Thinsulate™. They also have good treads on them that grip the icy sidewalk in a satisfying way and make me walk more like a sure-footed mountain goat, and less like a timid small elderly woman.
My torso was covered in my usual layers and dad's army coat, which always feels like a warm hug. On my hands I wore my fleece gloves, one pair inside another. A neck gaiter, knit hat, and hoodie hood complete the ensemble. The only thing that felt the stinging wind was the part of my face that was exposed to the air. I'm thinking I'll get one of those bank robber balaclavas and be ready to face whatever Mother dishes out this year.
I was all jazzed after core class but my finger's not ready to go back to grappling yet, so I just got changed and split. My body is used to doing the doubles, I think; I was full of energy after the class. So I decided fuck it, I'd walk home. No bad person is going to be lurking in the shadows tonight; it's way too cold to lay in wait. By the time I got to the hill I was rolling on endorphins, a silly grin under my neck gaiter as I puffed huge dragonlike clouds of steam from my nostrils.
Now I've thrown yet another load of laundry into the dryer and the house is steamy and warm and April fresh. I think I'm going to direct this post-exercise energy toward organizing the bedroom closet. Life is good!
7:48 PM
